Taking a Chance on Love

For those of us who still believe in the Tooth Fairy

Human nature propels us towards relationships, I guess because most of us believe true happiness lies in relating to, and being with someone you love and truly care about, someone you can communicate with on both an emotional and intellectual level, and let’s not forget the special ingredient that “turns you on” the chemistry factor.

Astrologically speaking, as a young Leo Sun conjunct Jupiter, sextile Neptune in Libra, love found me on a regular basis. My head, as my grandmother very succinctly put it was “always in the clouds”. I imagined being swept off by the proverbial White Knight and every new guy I met was “the one”. But here we are, some f**ty (plus) years later and guess what? Still hanging in there, waiting for that White Knight to appear so much for the romantic illusions (Neptune) of the young. The reality for most of us is very different from the dreams of youth. The one we end up marrying often turns into “Rasputin” somewhere down the track and you become the Wicked Witch of the West, but generally we stick it out until the kids go their own merry way.

That’s when the wake up calls commence and you start wondering what happened to the romantic, loving, communicative man/woman you married, or was that just another one of those Neptunian illusions of youth. At some point you may begin to question if you even like each other at all? Now, if you are an astrologer you go look at your synastry charts, the transits and the progressed synastry and then you might begin to understand what is happening here. If you aren’t an astrologer and going through this I suggest you locate one who does relationship astrology.

As we grow older, life takes on a momentum of its own, and suddenly we arrive at the ripe old age of 55 “out there” again looking for love. We’ve been hurt, we’ve grieved the loss of a loved one or we’ve simply decided there’s got to be “more to life than this”, there’s got to be “something better” or “I’d rather live alone than put up with a seemingly lifeless body, snoring in front of the telly every night” or “I need to get a life for myself”. So, we leave the relative security, stability and comfort (difficult if you’re a Taurus Rising) of the relationship to be “free of these frustrations” and there you are back on that old treadmill attempting to bring happiness into your life.

For a couple of years it’s fantastic – you please yourself what you do, when you do it, what time you come home and with whom, and best of all you don’t need anyone’s permission to go anywhere – in other words you have all the “freedom” you want. In fact, you now have so much freedom it’s difficult to decide what to do with it all. (You should probably bottle it, seal it and lock it away until the next time you have these cravings). As a consequence, a few years down the track what are you doing? Looking for another relationship, that’s what!! Why, you might well ask, would you want to give up that “freedom” to find someone else who probably goes to sleep in front of the telly anyway, and please let’s not forget that “domestic blindness and deafness” (a malady suffered by most men to varying degrees – Aries appear to be the worst – sorry guys).

Realistically speaking ladies, toy boys are only available if you have aged well with the assistance of a myriad of skin replenisher’s, have good makeup techniques, “know of” a good plastic surgeon or happen to look like “Cher” (even on a bad day this is good). And so, we begin a new journey in search of our holy grail “the soul mate” (Oh Please!). Some of us might be brave enough to go for a slightly younger man, if you happen to have Uranus conjunct your Ascendant, but he would need to show definite signs of maturity and responsibility with Saturn in the first house. You would find him more attractive if he was intelligent, able to throw enough words together to make a sentence and hold Certificates in Swedish, Remedial and Shiatsu Massage techniques (he has a Taurus Moon).

But, and here’s the thing, how do you know if he’s your soul mate? Well, you begin by using feminine wiles to obtain the necessary tools (date – time – place of birth) so you can race home and calculate his birth chart and compare it to yours (if you are an astrologer, if not find one quickly). You just can’t wait to look at the Synastry – can you? Got any idea how many disappointments are in store doing that? On the other hand – you might just be lucky enough to strike one that’s an “almost” perfect match. Or, you could do what lots of people do and make it fit somehow by finding some rather obscure connections.

Some Astrologers say the Nodes and Saturn show Karmic connections and I certainly don’t dispute this logic, in fact I use it myself in Relationship Charts. Aspects to the Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars, the Ascendant, the Midheaven, Pluto and Chiron are also strongly considered. To add the necessary spice to a Relationship Chart look at connections between the Asteroids Eros and Psyche. I also look at the Vertex, which I once heard referred to in a lecture by prominent Australian Astrologer Alia Ryder, as “the jerk you work with” (6th house), “the jerk you marry” (7th house) and “the jerk you sleep with” (8th house). I personally believe the Vertex to be a Karmic point in the chart. It’s not an easy association and can pinpoint an area of some discomfort, however, it’s a relationship you are meant to encounter and need to learn from.

I leave you with those thoughts and head off on my own voyage to the land of “soul mates”. Should I be lucky enough to find such a being on this planet, I will immediately throw our charts up on Solar Fire, and I kid you not, I will check out every little aspect I find, all those nuances in the charts and if I find “him” you will hear me shout “hallelujah” from the mountains to the ocean, that is from Windsor to Palm Beach.